THE FEAR OF MAKING MISTAKES

It is often said that peoples greatest enemy is fear… the fear of inadequacy and the fear of rejection may be some of the reasons why. However, fear is a thought in the mind, which means that people who are fearful are actually afraid of their own thoughts.

For me, when I start worrying about the prospect of failure, it is really me not wanting to seem a failure to the people I am close to/look up to.

Failure that no one is aware of can seem much easier to deal with. This is probably true for most of us; to buckle and fall flat on your face with no witness is much easier to deal with than a crowd of spectators witnessing your fall.

When we start worrying about other people’s judgments, of our failure; suddenly a blunder seems less like a bad judgment but more like an exposure of how inadequate we are.

The fear of being judged can stop us branching out to explore new opportunities. If we can just accept that our mistakes don’t define us, they can help us gain a greater sense of meaning and connection with people.

It becomes easier to help and understand people who have experienced the same failures in life that you have. You are now able to give authentic help and support them, since you have been there before. You become genuine, humble and more able to forgive.

It is true to say that there are some mistakes we have made in the past.  If we had a chance to re live that time again, we would definitely avoid doing the mistake. The past has gone, but what we can do is make choices based on our past experiences and knowledge that we have now.

The best way to live, I feel is do the things we want to do irrespective of what people may say or see. Doing this consequently may risk being seen as inadequate and yes people might form an opinion of you. But better to live than live a life full of regrets …. I wish I had ……I would have…..I should have… I could have….

We only have one life, take a chance, breath and live!!!

ENTRY 4: KEYS TO FINDING YOUR PURPOSE

The Fourth Step.....................

Now look at your Passions, Action, and Gift list and spend at least 15 minutes each day doing at least one thing from one of the lists.

 You might begin to feel apprehensive about doing things differently to your normal way of doing things. Change can feel uncomfortable but this is a normal feeling as you step out of your comfort zone. Stepping out of your comfort zone, may also cause you to be afraid. But don’t stop, just keep breathing and use the energy generated by the fear to help you take the next step!  

It’s important to note that when you are in your purpose you should feel, alive, happy, excited and energized. If you are feeling low then reflect on your list, be honest with yourself may be there is something you forgot to write down or do something from the list you may be avoiding.

ENTRY 3: KEYS TO FINDING YOUR PURPOSE...

The Third Step..............

Spend a few minutes to write down things you can do effortlessly.

If you’re stuck for things to write you may want to its get some feedback from people close to you such as family and friends who usually will be able to see things about you that you are not able to see in yourself.

These feedbacks may make you  realise that you have a natural talent for organising, or you are creative in the way you colour coordinate and present the outfits that you wear or have a calming voice that makes  people feel at ease, have a wonderful sense of humour or people always feel listened to when they speak to you etc... 

These are your gifts; they come easy and naturally without having to spend hours of time in study. Some people are gifted in Sewing, Art, Maths or Music. But giftings don't have to be conventional. For instance you can be a gifted teacher, gifted listener, gifted cook or even be gifted in making people laugh.

 

You are meant to use these gifts to serve your Life Purpose!

ENTRY 2: KEYS TO FINDING YOUR PURPOSE

The Second step to finding your purpose..........

Write down a list of names of people that you respect and look up to. Next to the names write why you feel that way about them. For example, you might admire Nelson Mandela for standing up for what is right and being prepared to sacrifice his  youth for a cause he believed in .

These role models don't actually have to be some one famous but can someone who you have  know personally or have been acquainted with. These people have qualities that you truly admire.They could be past teacher, a neighbour a friend, a family member an activist etc. The real reason you are attracted to these qualities are because you aspire to be more like them, These aspirations are part of your purpose. Make it your to mission in life to always move to becoming, to improving, so you too can be looked up to by your community, the youth, your neighbours etc 

In order to become these qualities you admire in your role model there are steps you must take these are known as your Actions!  

ENTRY 1: KEYS TO FINDING YOUR PURPOSE

The first step to finding your purpose..........


Write down list of the things that you really enjoy doing, or some thing you would do as a hobby

 Reflect about your present work if your working, any volunteer role you may have had in the past, your hobbies and list the things you really like about them.

Now if you were rich, basically you had no need to worry about money, what things would you do with your time? Write them your down and add them to your first list.  This final list represents your passions; the things that make you happy when you are doing them. They give you a buzz and drive your energy

Look out for step two in my next entry........

FINDING YOUR PURPOSE - sharing my thoughts...

Some may feel that life true meaning is to live, share with family and friends, work, have money and spend. Others may feel there is more to life and there is a reason why they are here on earth. 


It is to these people that I say they are not sure, I encourage you to look around and be still. Many are to used to running around and not connecting with their self.


The clue to your purpose is in your surroundings, environment, connections ,your dreams, your passions, what makes you happy, and even what doesn't make you happy, your inner thoughts.  

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